Man-tiques

It is a common misconception that the words "vintage" and "antique" have to do with elderly women with huge glasses and rollers in their hair. And while there may be some mild truth to this, there are antique-rs of all different ages, genders, and species out there who revel in the old smells of a vintage felt banner, the chipping patina of a retro industrial light, the rusty goodness of antique kitchenware all the same. Due to the overwhelming belief that a vintage itinerary consists of solely floral upholstery and tea sets, this blog will be showcasing how antiques can, in fact, come in a more...masculine form.

There are a plethora of decor options for the quintessential vintage "mancave", such as..

Old Gambling/Casino Machines 
(One of my personal favorite vintage items)

 It just gives me a warm, fuzzy feelings imagining all the homeless people, bachelor(lette) party goers, and 21 year olds drunkenly feeding their adrenaline.

Vintage Billiard Balls/Bowling Balls

Way edgier/more masculine/creative than waxed fruit. However, way more painful and dentally expensive if you happen to accidentally bite into one.

Vintage Bottles/Tobacco/Matches

 Think of how suave you'll appear to the ladies "hey baby, wanna grab a drink at my placer? I got vintage Patron?"  Note: I am not sure if vintage alcohol is even edible, but your date doesn't have to know that.

 Collectable vintage matchbooks are a creative and fun thing to keep in jars or vases. I hear Jessica Alba likes men who collect matchbooks. So...all you men get out there and start shoppin' and it's pretty much proven that J-Albs will leave her children and husband of 6 years for you.

Vintage Tobacco Boxes

 

 

 

 

 Cigar box drawers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vintage (Toy) Cars

Vintage (Real) Cars
 If you have more money than Oakland has felons....like Jay Leno.

 "Hi, my name is Jay. How did I get so rich and successful? By shopping secondhand, of course."

Try to catch me ridin' dirty.

Jay Leno and passenger kindly showing us the World's Fastest Nail File.

...Is there even a steering wheel on that side of the car?

Check out Jay's 10:00 & 2:00 action. Such form, such elegance, such grace.










And! I cannot leave out these magnificent, vintage toy car/alcohol hybrid babies

Vintage Tools
Because all men like to give the illusion that they are learned handymen...

 

To the untrained eye, this look may appear somewhat Leatherface-esque. However, any true vintage connoisseur would see this wall's splendor.

Vintage tool box transformed into an adorably unique planter.

  Wall Decor

 Nothing says man cave like a retro neon bar sign. These also double as a  nightlight i.e. Frankenstein in Big Daddy.

So Game of Thrones.

Miscellaneous Items

Now your brother, husband, boyfriend, male mistress, gay best friend, mail man, your attractive neighbor who you borrow sugar from even though you don't need sugar because you have an immense amount of kitchen supplies left over from when you said you'd bake all those things from Pinterest and didn't, etc. have no excuse to not join in on your wild and wonderful world of antiquing!




A big thank you to Zinnias at Melrose Antique Mall on W. Indian School Rd. for letting me take pictures of their awesome assortment of pieces.

Reasons to Shop Secondhand

Savvy Secondhand $hopping

"Ew gross, that's as old as my grandmother!" "Used? As in, not new? No way." "Someone else's sloppy seconds? No thanks!" "I think I'm just going to go to Ikea" are all things someone in the likes of a Paris Hilton might say (although, let's be honest Paris Hilton wouldn't be caught dead buying furniture from Ikea). But not you, dear reader. Oh no, you know the vast benefits that come with shopping secondhand, seeing the treasure in another man's Hilton..I mean trash. BUT, in case I have overestimated you, allow me to provide several reasons why shopping secondhand is something everyone should get on board with.

1. Cost Effective

I recently bought a bedroom set from a certain, Swedish, warehouse store, we'll call it Pikea. And although I didn't love the aesthetics of the furniture, I believed I was saving a bunch of money. However, I did not know that by saving money on furnishings, it cost me money in TIME. The hours and hours and hours it took assembling the furniture, piece by piece, screw by screw, nail by nail, was torture. Or at least it was torture for my boyfriend whom I made put it all together while I read Cosmo and supervised....Anyway, you can imagine my anger when I waltzed into a secondhand antiques mall about a month ago and found not only a cornucopia of beautiful furniture, but beautiful furniture that was inexpensive and didn't originate from a pile of veneered particleboard. 

You after saving all that money by shopping wisely:

2. Your Money Stays in the Community

Do you personally know anyone in Hong Kong? Do you have any college buddies over in Sweden? How's your old baby-sitter living in Indonesia? No? None of this applicable? Secondhand shopping at your local thrift store and antiques mall helps to foster the economy of your community and ultimately, your country.

3. You Could Discover a Wish Granting Genie and/or Flying Carpets

Has Aladdin, arguably the most notable secondhand shopper, taught us nothing? Clearly the inside of that giant golden cat thing was representative of an antiques mall. Aladdin didn't care the lamp and carpet were mysteriously used by a total stranger, and nor should you!

4. Not Recycling = Trash = Landfills = Gross/Smells

 Buying used goods cuts down on manufacturing demands and keeps more items out of the landfill. Which keeps the landfills from growing, and growing until they reach our homes, our schools, our streets, our shopping centers and movies theaters, and ultimately devouring all of civilization as we know it like The Blob. If you re-use items, that cuts down on "trash" being thrown away and gives the item a longer life, and ultimately helping save our planet. And if we don't work to save our planet we are going to have to colonize Mars and live there, with no Wi-Fi, in those hideous space outfits. Do you want that?

5. New Goodies Coming in Daily

I always feel like an awkward, incompetent failure as an employee when a customer at the antiques mall asks "Do you have any ____ ?" and I have to answer "Well, I'm not sure..perhaps...I mean, it's possible.." because there are new items brought in every day. It's impossible to tell what exactly is there all the time. For all you retro hunters out there, this means that the hunt continuously changes and keeps the stores fresh with new treasures to find.

So there you have it folks. Certainly there are many, many more reasons I could share about why shopping secondhand is advantageous, fun, and cost effective; but I am far too busy writing my strongly worded grievance letter to Pikea at the moment.